Not good at all mate, bitter-sweet says it all. You are under tremendous stress right now and need to be strong. Good news has to be there around the corner. I always take my Mum's advice to live one day at a time and make most of the life you have. She had leukemia in 1992, had a bone marrow transplant after going through hell with chemo but the good news is that she is alive and well at the age of 74.
Please be positive and supportive.
